Association Travel Correspondent
2nd February 2015
I have been instructed to inform you of my experiences at Torquay this year by Emeritus (the previous editor of Quo Vadis?) and endorsed by Jack who acts as a sociable secretary. As we have never met I feel I must let you know that my grammar is not always up to standard and I have difficulty in distinguishing between humour and seriousness which in some circles gives the impression that I am a bit dim. I have attended 31 AGMs, only missing two – a wedding & inclement weather. My first End-to-End was in 1979.
Mr Tetley at last year’s Torquay Weekend
On arrival at reception, the computer had a glitch. The documents that I was given stated that I was a female (Mrs ?) and that I was in a double room. On reaching the room, I took the two key cards out of the envelope and duly inserted one in the key slot – red light. I turned over the key – red light. Eventually I decided to seek advice from my friends Liz & Jem, who after reading the instructions, told me that I was trying to get into Room 105 and not Room 103 which the keys fitted. Needless to say I was called what Del Trotter calls Rodney. A Senior Moment, of course.
At Friday dinner I was told by “Mr. Chair” to look after a young couple so I put on my refined Brummie accent and apprised them of the virtues of the Association. At the Saturday morning AGM’s “Other Business,” I said that I was finding difficulty in remembering peoples’ names and apologised to everyone for these annoying Senior Moments of mine, as the frequency was causing me concern. Imagine my surprise when, before I had finished speaking, everybody in the room (well, nearly everybody) shouted out words to the effect, “Oh! Don’t we all”. Phew, what a relief that I was not the only one.
Mr. Emeritus beckoned me to see Eddie Sedgemore’s prize for winning the previous QV? puzzle; about half a dozen of us were close behind but it all depends where a comma was placed - well something minuscule. This, I treated as a wind-up meaning, “How about that, then?” After pressing the light button to go up in the lift, a face appeared before me, we both smiled, said nothing, and the door closed. At home, whilst looking through QV? I see a photograph of, I think, the face I closed the lift doors on, so if it is yours John Blanchard, please accept my apology for my ignorance.
Finally, I discovered that I had made the biggest mistake of my life – when Adrian, our friendly tax collector, told me that I had not paid my subs for 2015 saying, “Ya ain’t gimme ya subs yet. No subs – no QV?, no nuffin, nor nowt else, zilch, zero”. I paid up pronto. I enjoy being a member of the Land’s End – John o’ Groats Association its members & friends and Quo Vadis? All these things make me – a very happy Tea Bag.
Neville Tetley a.k.a. Tea Bags
P.S. Now to relax listening to CDs of Xavier Cugat, Harry James, Percy Faith, Jimmy Dorsey, Gene Krupa, Woody Herman & Tommy Dorsey. If members do not recognise these names they are young, but if they do then they are getting on a bit.